Hikikomori.Life Website

About Me (Generally)

Sept. 15, 2019

Basically Me If there was an image to describe my situation this picture would be speaking volumes. Two monitors, dark room, me, staring at it. Not a desk, but table. Bed in the same room with me. Typically spent alone. I talk to one person. I could be considered an anime trope except I'm not near high school age or around college age at all but I'm quite experienced at this lifestyle. It's been going on for what seems like forever. Anybody I do know just has their own thing going on, and there just isn't time for me or it's like nobody cares enough to try to fit into my life in some way that I could deem manageable. I don't let time burglers into my life since after all I do spend my life coding stuff and the easiest communication would be through IRC where I can come and go between discussing things and the messages just sit there. I make a fair amount of money, enough to live and still save some. I started coding when I was 11 1/2. I was writing C programs by the time I was 12. During this time the pinnacle of the 90's hacker scene was going on and I was under a pretty anonymous identity. To date nobody really figured me for any cerain gender or anything but it wasn't customary to ask too many personal questions back then because the person you're talking to (on IRC typically) wasn't gonna give his details either. I used to tell people if you ask my name I'm going to lie. I don't care as much about that anymore since leaving the scene. I hit the eject button around the time DDoS became a thing. I would eventually form into something that looks like I could do a real job in coding and for a bit I was indeed doing that. I eventually grew tired of being one of the cog/widget builders in a corporate structure, working long hours to make other people successful, no time to really catch up and left abruptly, for good. I began contracting instead which kinda puts you at the level of being your own boss in numerous ways. You can choose what to do for work, when not to work and allow your savings to begin the slow leak.

Fast forward some years later I actually run a downlow kinda business but I'm behind the scenes, I have a "front man" and all that who does the social end of talking to people and I interject very rarely. I don't like lording over people or making a big stink about how things are done, in the end they are mostly having fun and it seems like the right thing to do given that I have no room to be quacking like a duck at people about what to do... what not to do.

I like to play video games, watch media that's from the 80s or 90s and what bits and bobs are weird/strange out of print media. I dig anime and manga but not quite at a level that most people would think I was an Otaku or Japanophile, even if I've read easily over 500 manga books but that was like, circumstance at that time. I had free time. I like all sorts of music but typically don't like newer music. I found some things I like about speedcore and Dubstep but I wouldn't call myself a fan either. Otherwise I'm pretty open as long as somebody isn't trying to get me to check out the newest mumble rappers. I've been in the hikikomori forum back when that was a thing along w/ it's IRC. I forget what username I had. It really was like 10 years ago I bet. I was still nailing down this isolation thing, not even on purpose, it's just how things go I think when you don't "fit in" anywhere you go.

A rapid fire closing to this for now, I play guitar and piano. I drink too much. Not a NEET unless this semi-functional self-employment doesn't count (it so does tho). I'm in USA. I hate cellphones and only use it for 2fa (2 factor auth), I never pick up or make calls. I hope people visit my IRC. I kinda miss the remote connection with other hikikomori. It's kinda nice to just nod during conversation instead of rapidly trying to escape it. If I was to be described by a combo of people I'd probably be something like a mix of Dr. Girlfriend, Aeon Flux, the Dark Queen from Battletoads.. but with the chest of Sailor Moon. Humanity level: Vegeta. Social interest level: Tatsuhiro Satō.